Words by Colin Herring
The form reads
Please Print Full Name!
I belligerently write “dickhead”
Because that’s what people call me
When I’ve had too much to drink.
Are you of Aboriginal or Torres Strait descent?
A giant microscope appears above my head
I suddenly become self-aware;
Do you have any disability?
My slightly webbed toes become marginalized
And are happy they can hide.
They tell me it is compulsory to vote,
Yet I’m obliged to vote for the other side.
Because it’s two party preferred and
There is no Happy Birthday Party.
Sir Prince Philip was peed upon,
By a monkey at the zoo!
He said “you dirty buggar”….
A talking Monkey – well I never.
We fight for that right
To buy goods from China
For one dollar
And sell to other patriotic Australians
For forty five and in debt
Go to war to avoid money owing.
It’s another day at the zoo
Disjointed, bizarre, surreal.
Up to me to make sense.
Whoever the wise guy is.
I’m sick of being told,
Recent bushfires were bold.
Sir Prince Philip today….
A bomb exploded….,
Be afraid, wash your hands………
The disease is round your corner
Where the toilet paper used to be.
Drinking tea prolongs your life
One lump or two
Coffee, tea, milk, sugar
I’ll have the usual…thank you
Feature image: Tal kin jeri by Tabitha Lean